Stress is a loaded word. We don’t want to hear it, we definitely don’t want to experience it, and we certainly do not want to befriend it. But, did you know that stress can be your friend and befriending stress actually help you live longer?
Stress has become negative terminology because it is associated with negative feelings, experiences and outcomes. And, certainly, if you only look at it through this lens, you will experience stress as something that is a drain on your energy, your body, and your health.
One of my favorite Ted Talks on stress and the effects on your wellbeing is by Kelly McGonigal, “How to Make Stress Your Friend”. If you don’t have 15 mins to watch this video, I’ll sum up some key points for you here:
- There is good stress and bad stress – good stress helps you become more resilient and live a happier, healthier life but you have to be willing to see the world that way!
- Bad stress – or our inability to see stress as a good thing – can lead not just to a decline in health but an earlier death – an increased likelihood of nearly 43%, based on the study McGonigal cites.
- Human connection and caring for others can help support the good stress and create resilience, compassion, joy and…it can result in living longer, according to a separate study.
For many of us, the bad stress is unavoidable due to work, family, health or anything else that may be weighing us down. And, because bad stress can accumulate throughout our lifetime, we may not know anything other than a negatively stressful world. You may even be straying away from anything positive in life because you are so overloaded by the stress of your situation; you just don’t want to hear it or celebrate anything. In other words, human connection and good stress become more distant, and may even feel unattainable.
Either way, you aren’t alone – but these may be signs that it is time to seek change. If you aren’t ready for change, that’s okay. From our perspective, there is no judgment around where you are. If you’re not ready, you’re not ready. Just accepting your reality is an incredibly powerful way to start leaning into the good stress.
While there are many benefits to positive psychology and learning to live from a place of joy, gratitude and compassion; it can have its drawbacks too. In my practice, I have seen clients who work so hard everyday to stay positive that they never process their negative emotions. This can be like a volcano slowly bubbling below the surface, ready to erupt at any moment. There is nothing wrong with negative emotions – in fact, we NEED these; and, we wouldn’t be human if we didn’t have them. Our focus is on cultivating personal balance in positivity that allows you to feel and process your negative emotions in such a way that they don’t get in your way of living an overall healthy and positive lifestyle.
To eliminate the bad stressors and lean more into the good ones, focusing on what you can control becomes key. Learning to befriend the stress in your life that you can’t necessarily eliminate is essential. It is also very hard to do, which is why we are here to help support you. In the meantime, you may wish to try our recent meditation on “Embracing Stress”.
Many of our clients have found a new personal balance with stress and have been able to change their lives – without necessarily changing their external situation. Browse our website to read some testimonials. Asking for help is not a weakness, it’s a strength that shows you know your vulnerabilities and are ready to work on them. Asking for help makes you stronger.
The correlation between stress and health issues has been researched, studied, and written about for decades. The link between stress, inflammation, and chronic disease is on the rise. From a holistic healing perspective, learning to manage your emotional energy – and thereby better managing excessive cortisol levels that rise under stress, creating more inflammation in the body – by building more gratitude, empathy, and non-judgment is key to any healing path.
If you feel like you’re ready for more self-discovery and to continue on your path, schedule a free 15 minute consultation to see if Path Wellbeing is right for you.
Required Disclosure: Path Wellbeing is not a Western medical provider and should not replace your Western medical provider. The information contained within this article is for educational purposes only and should not replace the direct advice of a doctor or other qualified healthcare professional. Always consult a medical or other professional healthcare provider when considering a new health regime.